Things I Learned Today

So, this morning I got up at 8:30 planning to head to the farm market across from the UC Irvine campus, by velo of course. Somehow, it took over two hours for me to get myself together and out the door. Since the market ends at noon, I knew I'd have to push to make sure I flew along the nearly five miles of trail I'd mapped out last night. I was excited to get to do some exploring, with a reward of fresh produce (and possibly food truck fare) at the end (or middle, really, since you have to get home, too).

Thing I Learned #1:

If the bike trails on Googlemaps look a bit confusing, you should be suspicious about what they'll really be like. Also, if you own a bikeways map AND an area road map for Southern California, and you're riding to a place you haven't ridden before, you should take them with you. No. Really.

As you can imagine, I took none of my maps with me. Google got me lost within the first half mile, directing me away from the easiest way down to Jeffrey and sending me spiraling through another neighborhood. I righted myself and took the familiar way down to what I think of as one of the main drags. Now, I knew that this main drag would take me pretty much straight to the campus, and thereby the farm market. But I also knew there was Shady Canyon Trail, which would take me on a slightly more circuitous route to campus. But hey, when you've just moved to an area, and you want to get out for a ride, circuitous is good, right?

Thing I Learned #2:
Circuitous may also include pretty severe changes in elevation. As you may know from earlier posts, it's absolutely a blast to ride the velo downhill. But the weight and the inability to stand up on the pedals make climbs a bear.

So I sweated and climbed and grinned as I whipped down the other side of rolling brown hills. I kept looking for signs on the streets I intersected, and kept finding none. But then I reached Culver. Culver I know. Except I didn't really want to turn onto it because A) straight ahead I could see Anteater Rd, and knew it would take me to the campus, because UCI's mascot is the Anteater and B) Culver turned into Bonita Canyon Dr at this point, and that's a little far afield. Still, up ahead, there was no bike path or lane on the left, and I didn't want to be riding against traffic in that situation. So I turned left onto Culver/Bonita Canyon.

Thing I Learned #3:
If you think you've made a wrong turn, turn around as soon as possible. Don't keep thinking you'll see a familiar street (in a neighborhood that is totally unfamiliar to you) and be able to just cut over. Just turn around.

But turning around in the velo is hard, so I kept looking for that promising right turn. Except none presented itself, and I soon found myself rolling toward Newport Beach. I briefly considered ditching the market all together and pretending I'd meant to ride out to the beach the whole time. I should also note that at this point, I even knew the market would be ending soon, though I was hardly stopping to check the time, or even take pictures (sorry). Eventually, I admitted to myself that I'd have to turn around, and found a handy church driveway to help out. Except that not many people come out of church driveways on Saturday mornings, so the light went through several cycles of allowing the people across the way to turn, but never turning green for me. I had to roll backwards (of course this was on a hill), set the brake and awkwardly climb half out of the velo to push the crosswalk button to my right. (People, please, just put that thing closer to the street!) I just made it back into my seat to catch the green, and finally was able to get pointed back in the right direction.

Thing I Learned #4:
There are no signs for the farm market posted at other parts of the campus. So even though you are riding through campus, you'll still have no real idea of where to turn.

Finally, I found Campus Rd, which I knew was part of the corner (with Bridge) where the market would be. Right or left? Well, easier to turn right, I thought. So I did. Which, again, was the wrong choice. I was within a stone's throw of finally finding the market, and I blew it. After a few intersections, including Culver again, I just gave up. I knew I wouldn't find the market in time, and I just wanted to get home and get some lunch.

Thing I Learned #5:
Even if the way you came out is less than perfect, it would be easier to retrace your steps than to trust in your random choice of roads to get you back.

Much of Irvine is on a grid, because it's a huge planned community. However, that huge planned community consists of neighborhoods, which are often in loops. For example, the neighborhood around Turtle Rock. Would turning right onto that road have gotten me home if it had been a grid? Again, it would have been circuitous, but eventually, yes. Is it a grid? No. Is it a circle? Yes. Is it a hilly circle? Yes.

Thing I Learned #6:
Don't tease cyclists.

So, as I crept up Turtle Rock Rd's first climb, I saw two guys on very sleek road bikes grow closer and closer in my rearview mirrors. This didn't surprise me; their bikes weigh probably a third of the velo, their granny gears probably work reliably, and they can use their body weight to help push the pedals around for climbs. So, of course, they passed me, and one guy rather disdainfully said, "Boy, that thing must be a lot of work climbing hills like this." "Yeah," I replied, "but the downhills are fun!" They made a show of pushing up the hill pretty quickly, and I creaked along, all the time watching for familiar street names. I kept thinking maybe I should have asked them the best way to get back home, but something about the look that guy gave the velo made me pretty sure I'd rather blow by them in a cloud of dust. Which became possible on a nearby downhill. I saw them grow from shining spots to bikes rather rapidly (they weren't even crouching into the wind!), checked for cars, then swung around them on the left, waving gleefully as a zoomed by. And then, wouldn't you know it, up came another climb, and the shining specks grew in my mirrors once more. A few moments later, I was staring at their spandexed butts, gritting my teeth over the guy who said "And that's all I have to say about THAT" as he stood on the pedals to climb past, and the other dude who simply extended his fist behind him. Maybe that was a sign of solidarity, but I took it for an insult.

Finally, I saw a road I knew I'd meant to cross earlier, Ridgeline, and turned right. Ah, glorious downhill! I hit the mid-fifties before tapping the brakes to control the shimmy of the velo, but didn't see a single spandexed butt in sight. What a shame.

Thing I Learned #7:
There's a handy bike path that follows right along University Drive/Jeffery. It's worth just taking that, I think, unless you're in the mood for plenty of hills.

So, I made it home from there pretty swiftly, and even took a couple of pictures once I knew I was safely on the right track again.

Ahead you can see more big hills, though thankfully at this point I had a nice downhill ahead of me rather than a climb. Note the very deserty look to my right.

And voila, to my left, plenty of trees and shrubs to indicate a neighborhood. I like trees and grass, but I do wonder if Irvine's missed the memo entirely about water conservation when there's a drought on.

Thing I Learned #8:
If you ride in the velo in summery weather (even if it's less evil than what my poor east-coasters are suffering right now) for two hours, you will sweat a LOT. If you happen to be wearing green cotton shorts, the sweat on those will really show up.

And it will look like you wet yourself. And if you happen to check the mail despite being fairly sure that you have a big wet spot on your rear, you will see one of your neighbors for the first time ever. And then you'll get into your place, look into the mirrored wall, and realize there's a big wet spot on BOTH sides of your shorts.

So, back to black. Take the maps. Be wary of cyclist flack.